Day 9 Write your fears

Fear comes from the unknown outcome usually when something is different or is a change, we let our imagination take charge and it can be pretty wild in the outcomes we assume could happen.

We are creatures of habit and we are programmed to do things that are familiar and make us feel safe.

Today is about is thinking about your fears, write them down, look at them.

Are they real fears? What exactly is it you fear?

Is there a way that you can overcome them?

When you see them in black and white does it make them seem ridiculous?

There are so many things in life that we want, but fear holds us back and that is what we are looking at today rather than a fear of spiders, which unless you want a job that involves touching spiders is not going to be a fear that holds you back.

I have a genuine dislike of heights, I hold on to the banister going down the stairs in my house because I can get dizzy. It’s sudden drops down that scare me though, I can go up hills and appreciate the view. Even though I have this fear, I climbed Sydney Harbour Bridge, it was a once in a lifetime experience that I wanted to do and enjoyed the view… just don’t ask me to look down.  Yes, I was scared, but for me it was worth it.

On the other hand I am scared of some films, Taken freaked me out… that is not a real fear…it’s a move, not real life and that fear doesn’t hold me back in life.

Your fears could be from a whole list of things:

A new job, a whole new career where you have to start from square 1, starting your own business, coming out of a relationship that you know you are not happy in, going in to a new relationship when you have been single for ages, starting your personal training sessions, starting to eat for your health instead of the junk comfort foods, signing up for that course you have been looking at for ages, even getting a new haircut…

You know that you have a list of things that you want to achieve and there are things that you need to change to get there.

Write down what it is you are afraid of for each one and think about what it is you are actually afraid of and how you could overcome that fear or is there something you could do to make it better.

When I was really struggling, every morning I would write my morning pages.

As soon as I woke up, before I did anything else, I picked up the pen and notepad by the side of my bed and wrote, 2 sides of A4 paper.

Just whatever came in to my head, you don’t think about what you are writing, or spelling or grammar, try not to take the pen off the paper and just write.

I never read it back, and still to this day haven’t. the theory behind it is you get rid of the nonsense crap you don’t need and puts you in touch with the dreams you do need.

Doing it first thing when you wake up is when you are most in tune with your dreams and unconscious mind, as soon as the logical side of your brain kicks in it can be harder to hear the unconscious part.

Just doing this can unblock some of your fears and insecurities and answer some questions that you struggle to work out.

I saw a link on Facebook just yesterday talking about fear and how it is the most boring thing about you… your fears are boring, my fears are boring and they make us boring…

Go write your fears and remember change doesn’t happen repeating the same things over, you need to challenge yourself to change… Acknowledge the fear then ditch it… Lets not be boring

Jen x

 

6 down 6 to go

In the blink of an eye, that is us at the end of June…

Have a think about the first half of your year… how has that gone for you?

Think back to your New Year resolutions if you made any… How many have you ticked off? How many are you working your way towards? How many have you completely ignored and are pretending that you don’t really want that change now?

I had one on my list that I don’t even know where it came from, it had never been a dream or aspiration before… I was just sitting looking at my list one day and I wrote it down… I want to write a book.

When I wrote it down I did think, yeah, maybe one day, won’t be this year, might not even be this decade…

But, the universe had other ideas.

I am writing a book AND it’s getting published… Yip, you heard it right, it is happening.

Having the right conversations with the right people at the right time has propelled this forward to happening this year with date of publish to be next year… My first draft is due in at the end of August.

Excited is not even close, I am also shitting myself but it will all be good. Practicing this vulnerability stuff, putting my words out there for people to see and have an opinion on.

The first step in getting anything done is saying it out loud, telling people, but making sure that you tell the right people.

There will always be people in your world who will be delighted and will help you make things happen and there will be people who will question you and make you feel stupid for even thinking that you could ever…

Don’t tell those people who will aid your self-sabotage – you can do that crap on your own… Tell the people who will believe in you, support you and potentially be able to help you make it happen.

Choose your people wisely.

Happy Tuesday

Jen x

PS If you know anyone who would benefit from these emails or from Warrior Woman Project please send them over to www.freedomintraining.co.uk to sign up

 

The secret to your success

Yesterday I lectured you…

I would apologise, but sometimes you need a bit of a rant for you to take action.

How did you do on your task?

What could you do to make a positive impact on your life? Did you do anything about it?

Time and time again I hear the same old excuse ‘I’m too busy’.

This has to be the worst excuse ever, especially when you make time to do things for other people all the time… I would put money on the fact that you say yes to your boss, colleagues and clients making sacrifices on your own time to do things for them.

Everyone has the same 24hrs in the day, we need to prioritise that time to make sure that we get time for ourselves.

I am going to ask you this, why do you think on an aeroplane you need to put your own mask on first before helping others?

What use to the world are you if you are not in your best form?

If you are already pretty amazing at doing stuff for other people, imagine how much better you would be if you were an improved version of what you are now…

Just putting that out there for you to have a think about.

Every single thing you do counts…

You choose what you buy when you go to the supermarket (and you know that fruit and veg is better than cake and crisps).

A stir-fry takes less than 10mins to cook, even less if you take the pre chopped bags of veg.

You choose to stay in bed an extra hour rather than get up and do some exercises in the morning, whether it’s in the house or getting to the gym.

You choose to sit and watch TV instead of reading that book, doing a course, learning something new, working on that hobby that you would love to do as work instead of the job you do.

You put so much effort in for other people, and you are the most important person in your world (it’s OK to be selfish when it makes you better for you and everyone else).

Great results come from consistent work every single day.

It’s never too late to start making better choices, putting in more effort, becoming consistent.

The only thing that stops you is you. You have the final decision on everything in your life.

The small seemingly insignificant changes can have the biggest impact.

I took the decision to smile and say hi first at people in the gym means I now chat to loads of people in there now, I love going in even more now because it’s a nice, friendly experience and some of those old dudes have the best chat!

All from just being the one to smile first.

It was a massive thing for me to find the confidence to do but in terms of the world was a tiny thing to change.

My challenge to you… Make a tiny change and do it consistently.

Have an epic week.

Jen x

 

 

 

 

Who motivates you?

How has your week gone so far?

Are you on top of your goals?

Following the right path?

Making the right decisions?

Some?

Whatever has been happening, today is a new day. What happened yesterday is done, the past, you can’t change what you did, said, ate or drank.

The past is gone. Good or bad, it doesn’t matter. It doesn’t define you and it has no effect on your future. Unless you let it

If you have not been doing the best for your health (eating and activity), today you change that.

You start right now. Have a healthy breakfast (if you are reading this before you get up) if you have already had breakfast whatever your next meal is, make it healthy and delicious.

If you decided to have a few drinks on a school night (shame on you…It’s only Tuesday lol), drink lots of water, take a multivitamin and eat lots of veg and protein to get over it and avoid the carb craving binge.

If you have stopped pushing towards your goal, taken your foot off the pedal or filled your head with excuses. Quit that now, get your head out your arse, make a list of what needs done and get working on it.

Your happiness is your responsibility, we all do it, we get scared of failure of the things that we don’t have total control over.

You know what’s worse than failure?

Nothing changing and everything staying the same.

To get a change, you need to make a change. Ask for help. Get some coaching, seek out the best help you can afford (http://freedomintraining.co.uk/warrior-woman-project/).

Seek out the person who speaks your language, and understands where you are and how to motivate you.

What can you do right now that will make a positive impact on your life?

Think about it and by the end of the day take action on it.

Have an awesome Tuesday

Jen x

 

It is not the strongest of the species that survives

It is not the strongest of the species that survives, nor the most intelligent, but the one most responsive to change. (Charles Darwin)

I speak a lot about setting goals, making plans, creating opportunities to make your life better.

How is that all going for you?

Have you sat and agreed with things I have said, thought, ‘yeah I must set some goals and create a plan’ but haven’t gotten round to it yet?

As humans we are conditioned to be happy with familiarity. Knowing what is going to happen, unpredictable is where most of us are content to settle.

How do you cope when things change?

I was having a moan early in the summer to my flatmate about the Commonwealth Games coming to Glasgow and about how it was going to be a pain in the arse with roads through the city being closed.

The thing that bothered me most is its going to be different, I was going to have to find different ways to get to my classes and I couldn’t predict how that is going to happen.

For 2 weeks the city was going to be unpredictable & busy.

Flipping the negative way of thinking, it’s going to be exciting… the city is going to be unpredictable and busy.

Turned out that the roads were quiet and there were no traffic problems at all, the city centre was buzzing with atmosphere and a great place to hang out for the 2 weeks… It’s mid-November now and I still miss it.

How often do you hear that there is going to be a change and the first thing you think is negative?

‘that’s not going to work’ ‘people won’t like that’

I was working in one of the colleges as they were going through a merger, it was a very negative environment to be in. At the end of the day the changes were happening, there was nothing any amount of hissy fitting or moaning would make a difference.

As Darwin says, adapting to change is how we survive.

Being more positive about the change will make your life less stressful.

Being less stressed will make you happier, help you make better choices, help you sleep better and keep your skin looking fresher and younger.

Embrace the change.

If you are making change for yourself, it will be to make your life better. If the change is out of your control, control what you can, and that is you and only you.

Have a good weekend

Jen x