Its not them, its you…

So yesterday I told you about the course I was at with all the master trainers from Europe…

What an amazing day of learning we had.

The best bit was no matter what any of the other trainers experience or background was they were there to learn from each other, share ideas and help each other.

Even though they work hundreds of miles apart from each other they are a team and you can feel that just being in their presence.

I mentioned on about feeling a bit overwhelmed and out of my depth going in to this situation.

Not only are some of these guys elite athletes but highly educated – One of them has a Phd in Exercise Physiology and is a lecturer at the University of Madrid…

I was in amongst some very clever and very experienced people.

The only person who doubted my ability was me.

The only person judging me was me.

Within seconds of meeting this group of people I knew I had nothing to worry about. They were all open and friendly even though for quite a few there was a serious language barrier.

We are often very quick to assume or make up in our heads what other people are thinking about us or a situation.

And more often than not we are wrong.

One of the first things I learned when I started working with my coach was to accept responsibility for my thoughts. It’s not them, it’s you.

It is you that is interpreting someone’s words or actions.

It is you that is reacting to it instead of responding.

You have no idea how powerful that tiny switch is.

That is something that I teach on my coaching clients in Find My Freedom.

I help my clients understand the language they use and how small re phrasing can make the biggest of differences in how they think and how they respond to others.

How many times have you blown up at someone in an instant reaction wishing minutes later you had just thought for a second or two more and responded in a much better way?

It’s not about learning to bite your tongue, because things need to be said. How you say them makes all the difference.

How you feel about yourself. Having the confidence and self-belief to open your mouth and stand up for yourself without coming across aggressive or defensive.

I have a meeting with my coach this morning. I love sitting down and talking (sometimes at him) for about 20 mins until I get everything off my chest. Then I can breathe.  We work on business and personal ‘stuff’.

Without a coach I would not be where I am today. I would not have gone back to uni and graduated yesterday. I would probably be in a shit job, feeling sorry for myself wishing that I had been brave enough to try and start a business on my own doing something I love and am 100% passionate about.

My top tips:

Do your workout at least every other day

Work on your values

Work on breaking your self-sabotage habits.

And have a good weekend.

Jen x





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