Before I get in to anything else… Your list, remember read through it again, remind yourself of all your awesome warriorness (yes I just made that word up) and add to it again this morning.
I love to get feedback from you Warriors and this was sent through to me the other day by one of my warriors on the 12 week online programme. For personal reasons she wishes to remain anonymous.
‘One thing though is that even reading the weekly (and daily) emails, have started to make me think a lot more about thing – and ACTUALLY, and this is a new departure for me, it has made me start to think about MYSELF.
What do I want, and what do I need in the future.
I will get to work on writing out goals very soon. Something has had me frozen to the core, and quite unable to move, decide, take action on much over the last while. But slowly, I’m sure I’ll get over this phase…
…I know you wrote about your own personal experience of going from a 2 to a 1, and that situation is what has me in the limboland I’m in just now. But I know it won’t be forever. I am at a crossroads, and I just need to decide which road to take.’
Every single decision we have to make in life is some sort of crossroads, what you need to keep in mind with every decision is what is right for me to make me happy…
Something as simple as what to have for dinner, chippy or stir fry? That decision needs to be what is going to make you happy… I had chippy chips the other night because I hadn’t had them in ages and had been craving them for weeks… Did they make me happy? Yes. Did I care that they are not a substantial meal? A wee bit, so I had a bowl of veg soup as well to balance it out a bit. Did I feel guilty? Nope.
When it comes to more complex things like staying in a relationship it is going to be more challenging. It’s not just you that is involved. But you do need to look at the situation from the outside to see what it is that is actually happening…
In my case Jake was staying in Glasgow to make me happy but in turn wasn’t making himself happy, and that didn’t make me happy. We had to make the decision that he went back to Australia and in the short term we were both very sad, and both felt guilty and had to learn to forgive ourselves which has taken time and external help, but ultimately we are now both in places where we can focus on making ourselves happy.
I can’t speak for him, but I am happy.
Learning that it is okay to be selfish is challenging, especially when there is other people’s happiness involved.
Ultimately, you need to do what is right for you first and the rest will fall in to place (and it doesn’t always end up in break ups and divorce).
Remember your list, and stop giving yourself a hard time about the decisions you make.
PS There are only a few seats left now for the workshop, if you have not already secured your seat please head over https://warriorwomanproject.ticketlight.co.uk/order/gateway/13311630 to book your seat, remember you can bring a friend for £5.
PPS If you know anyone that would benefit from the workshop of these emails please forward them on, send them over to my website to sign up www.freedomintraining.co.uk or if you think they would benefit from my online course www.warriorwomanproject.com there are so many ways to connect with us here at the Warrior Woman Project the more people we can encourage and get involved the happier we will all be…