Do you live for the weekend?

Do you live for the weekend?

All through Facebook, Instagram & Twitter you see posts TGIF, can’t wait for the weekend, this has been such a long week, counting down the days.

Then on Sunday, it’s all, oh no its Monday tomorrow already, back to work tomorrow with sad faces.

I used to be one of those people, at the start of the year planning my holidays in for the year, spaced out to perfection to maximise the bank holiday weekends. Then the countdown was on.

I used to have a Monday to Saturday 9 – 530 office type job that I quickly grew to feel suffocated in.

Actually I had a few, there were times that I loved but I quickly got bored and I could never understand why, if I had finished all my work did I still need to sit there and fill time just to work the contracted hours. I worked in the travel industry for about 15 years, in travel agents, selling foreign currency, doing admin, and in a call centre doing customer services for airlines.

I did get to live abroad for a couple of years in my travel career which was amazing and I wouldn’t change that for the world, but I was still in an office, still working to hours that someone else dictated to me.

I also got to learn a lot about places in the world that made me want to go and visit them (which I did), I have always been a gypsy at heart, and don’t like to feel trapped or stuck.

In 2002 I went to live in Greece, I finally came back to the UK for good in l 2009. I had travelled around Europe, South East Asia, China, Mongolia, Russia, and lived in Australia for 3 years too.

When I decided to come home I decided it was time to have a career change. The thought of being cooped up in an office again made me want to cry.

I had fallen in love with the gym, doing exercise and being fit and healthy, it made me feel free and inspired and it was all I wanted to know about. Day and night I was reading and learning about health and fitness.

I went back to college as a mature student and had to work pretty much full time hours around that while I retrained. I was 6am to 10pm Monday to Friday, worked Saturday mornings too then Saturday afternoons and Sundays doing my studying.

My days were like that until May 2014.

When you want something badly enough you make the sacrifices you need to get you where you want to be.

Now I have more time to myself I actually don’t feel like I ever do any actual work, everything I do I love, whether its writing these emails or my blog posts, training clients, teaching classes, learning, talking, I just never feel that dread of having to get up.

I LOVE what I do. When I talk to people about what I am doing or what I am learning I can feel the smile on my face. I get excited about what I am talking about.

I can hear myself being a total geek and I am so happy when I can tell people things that will help them improve, whether it’s about confidence, getting a plan to achieving their goals, eating better, performing better in class or changing their body shape.

I believe that we are all here to do what makes us happy. How happy are you with where you are in your life? Do you get to do what you love every day?

If you are one of those people living for their holidays and the weekend, have a think about these questions.

What is it that you love to do?

What is it that you can talk about for hours and hours and never get bored of?

Do you get to fill your days doing that?

Are you counting the days till your next holiday or the end of your shift?

If you could do anything at all, all day, every day what would it be?

Is there a way you can start getting more of that in your life?

If you knew that you would be happy 99% of the mornings you were getting up for work, would you take a risk and make the change?

What can you do today to put more (even if it’s only for a really short time) happiness in your day?

The thing you need to understand about  the Law of Attraction and The Secret purely is that yes, you need to put it out there what it is you want, but you also need to take some action. You need to create your own miracles.

You need the thoughts, then, you need to take action. I don’t believe for one second that Oprah just sits in her living room thinking about what she wants. She is an action taker. She has pushed her whole career for amazing things.

Oprah is a big believer in Law of Attraction and The Secret and believes in her ‘God’ whoever he is to her.

If you need to believe in something external to help push you forward, then that is what you do. Whatever your external belief is will help you.

Believe in it, work hard, take risks, find your passion and take the leap of faith.

Life is too short to be living life waiting for the weekend / holidays / to retire so you can do what you love to do.

Do it now.

Jen x

 

Do you find it difficult?

Why is it when we want to look better we obsess about what we can and can’t eat. What we should be doing, what we shouldn’t be doing. What the person we follow on instagram eats and how they look.

There are a band of people that live for their cheat day just so they can eat or drink whatever they want. And when they do, they go to town on a serious binge. In my opinion this is no way to live and isn’t healthy.

I was reading a blog post the other day about vegetarians and vegetarianism in general, and about how they are so good at sticking to their chosen diet. I am not about to tell you that you need to be vegetarian or vegan, I know plenty of them that don’t eat healthily either.

Up until about 3 months ago not a single piece of meat had passed my lips since 2005 (I had a notion to try fish, one small bite which took me about half an hour to work up to trying, pointless… still don’t want to eat it).

The question is why is it that vegetarians and vegans can stick to their diets so well without wanting to ‘cheat’?

It comes down to their VALUES and personal beliefs. Whether it’s about animal welfare / cruelty, environmental issues, health or whatever their reason is, they don’t sway.

The values are set.  It’s their belief and they stick to it. It’s not even up for discussion.

For many of them their diet is not based around trying to lose weight or look better naked. Anyone who has tried being veggie to lose weight will have discovered pretty quickly that it doesn’t work for them.

For someone who chooses to be veggie, there is not even any temptation, and most of us don’t even think about it, it’s just our way of life.

Why is it then, for so many other people who do want to lose weight and look better naked that they feel hard done by, giving up certain food that they know makes them feel like shit?

From a young age many of us have been rewarded with food – to keep quiet, to behave, to do homework / chores etc. If you are good you will get cake / crisps / sweets etc. That is the value we have then given to food, so when we take it away it feels like a punishment.

Now, I am thinking, if you understand your values, and know WHY you want to look and feel better you won’t feel like you are being hard-done to when you ditch the shit food & drink??

You won’t be relying on willpower to help you resist temptation… There will be no temptation just like for a vegetarian.

Take the time to think about what it is you actually want and what you will get from achieving this particular goal… Will you feel more confident? Happy? Sexy? In control? Or significant? Whatever it is that you really want from achieving the goal is going to help you feel better about the journey.

The food industry are only interested in 1 thing… Profit. They put food out there with chemicals that they know you will be addicted to so you buy more.

Then they produce the diet version for you to get addicted to while you are trying to lose weight from the other crap that makes you so happy but so unhappy at the same time.

Ever eaten a packet of sweets, got the sugar buzz, then the sicky feeling crash that makes you want more sugar to take the edge of the sugar comedown off?

Yeah, me too…

I know which feeling I prefer and it ain’t the sugar comedown.

Ever had that reaction to steak and salad? A plate of roast veggies? A bowl of porridge?

No, me neither…

They also run advertising campaigns that trigger emotions if you eat or drink their product – chocolate = relaxed, coke = fun, haribo = like a kid etc.

Understand and live by your values and reasons why and use them in all areas of your life. All of a sudden life gets a whole lot easier. When you have a dilemma, think about what fits better with your values. Bingo, decision made.

Just something for you to have a think about if you are struggling with the thought of cutting things out.

It doesn’t need to be about willpower (which, like a muscle needs to be worked on)… To help you strengthen your willpower muscle make it about your personal values and see how much more successful you are.

Jen x

 

It’s what Sunday’s are for…

For quite a while now on Sundays I have been trying to do different things with my day. I am expanding my culture and experiences to develop me as a person.

This weekend I was at the Body Type Nutrition Conference learning with a couple of friends.

I have been to the Art Galleries, the Transport Museum, Gallery of Modern Art, walked up Conic Hill, been climbing, to movies at the GFT… Some of them I have done with friends, some on my own.

How often do you do things outside of your normal routine?

Do you ever go off and do stuff on your own? Taking time out by yourself.

I love spending time alone. Pottering, writing, reading, people watching, thinking about things, thinking about nothing.

I totally believe that you NEED to be comfortable doing things on your own.

It’s even more than comfortable, but happy & content. There is nothing more freeing and empowering than liking your own company.

People have more respect for you when they see that you are independent, weirdly it makes people want to hang out with you more.

Why do people want to hang out with you more? Because you display good, strong values and they see that they can learn from you.

If you are someone who isn’t comfortable on their own, like as soon as you are left alone the first thing you do is grab your phone and start texting, checking Facebook/ twitter or reading your emails.

Learn to not do that.

Your challenge for this week, if its something you are not good at.

Be alone, no phone for comfort. Go somewhere, do something different.

Go to a museum, coffee shop (you can take a book to read, but don’t use social media if you have your kindle/ipad/tablet to read, it must be a book), go for a walk, go for dinner, go on a day trip (the city tour buses are always good).

Let me know what you are doing for your challenge.

Have a good week, and push yourself to do something outside your comfort zone.

Did You Just Call Me Ugly?

Did You Just Call Me Ugly?

Did you just call me ugly?

Call a girl pretty and she will forget in an hour, call a girl ugly and she will remember forever…

Why is that? Why is it easier to hold on to the pain than the pleasure? Why do we find it so easy to believe bad things about ourselves but not good?

Is it the belief that we are so egotistical if we take and believe the compliment?

Is it that you worry people will assume we think we are better than them?

Is it a fear that not being good enough is easier to handle so when we fail at things in life there is an excuse…

I am single because I am ugly, I am not doing the job of my dreams because I am not smart enough, I have not run the 5K because I am not fit enough, I can’t do exercise because I am too fat, I won’t get anywhere in this world because I failed a test at school and they said I wasn’t smart enough…

Listen to the crap you are telling yourself!

It needs to stop… Step outside yourself for a minute when you are saying these things and hear the words. What would you think if you were overhearing that conversation?

Start having better conversations with yourself and accepting compliments.

If someone says something mean to you, don’t let it bring you down they are speaking out of fear and jealousy. You have enough of that shit going on in your own head, do not take it from anyone else.

Show your strengths. Work on your weaknesses. Take care of yourself. Love what you see in the mirror.

What is pretty or ugly is subjective – if we all thought the same stuff was pretty we would be screwed.

Stop beating yourself up it’s clearly not making you feel better.

Change Starts With You

Change Starts With You

How many times do you go on a course and get all motivated about changes then get back to work and within an hour motivation is gone, you drop straight back in to your old patterns and state?

It can be the same when you have time off, or have been on holiday, you come back with great ideas of how you are going to make more time for you, for other people then boom, back to ‘reality’ and its forgotten.

What is it that makes it so easy to forget that dream,, the drive to be better, to want more, to live a happier existence but then do nothing about it?

Is it easier just to drop in to the old routine that is okay just not amazing?

Is it fear of change?

Is it fear of the unknown?

Do you not care enough about the promises you make to yourself?

Do they not meet your values?

Do you even understand your values?

Don’t let yourself and others close to you down just because its easier to be the way you were.

Change is good, change creates greatness and it can only start will you. Break the patterns. Change the mindset. Grow to be the better person you promised yourself you would be

Be proud?

How many things have you done with your life that you have taken a moment to sit back and be proud of yourself?

I went through a phase of doing things, and being so focused on the next thing that I didn’t appreciate anything that I had done.

When I was going for NLP coaching I remember Brian (my coach) asking me how I felt about having done and achieving so many things already in life. Did I not feel proud?

At that moment in time I could quite honestly say that I did not know what it felt like to feel proud about achievements.

Being too proud to accept help I am a pro at, but being able to step back and say ‘I did that, it was hard work, and I pushed through against the odds and got there’ that kind of pride was alien to me.

Having people around you that point out your achievements. That make you realise that what you have done is out of the ordinary. That you are achieving things that many people would shy away from. They make you stop and celebrate your success with you.

I never dreamt when I was leaving school that I would even want to go to uni, never mind return to education at 30 years old.

I then went through a divorce and lost my grandmother in a short space of time and still achieved the highest grade in my class for my graded unit at college.

I didn’t stop to be proud, I needed to keep busy, find something else to drive me forward.

June 2014 I graduated from Stirling University with a Postgraduate Diploma with MERIT.  I left school with a Higher in English, and I was tutored the whole year to get me that C.

Since finding out I passed, and then finding out I passed with merit, I have felt proud of everything I am achieving.

More recently, my new business that I have set up and I am working on all on my own (with the exception of my business mentor), my consistent training I am getting stronger and happier with my body shape than I have been in years.

There is always room for improvement but appreciating the journey rather than focusing on the next destination.

The difference? I slowed down, took time to appreciate everything I was doing.

I stopped and took a look back at the last 5 years. Even the last 10 years. I have done more in the last decade than some have done in a lifetime. There is a lot there for me to be proud of.

When was the last time you stopped and looked back?

Start to write down some of your achievements. Once you get started and talk to the people close to you, they will remind you of things.

Keep your list.

I found an awesome book, every day you write a line, a memory, achievement, anything at all for that day. Every year you start again at the beginning.

Over 5 years you can see what happened on that very same date the year before.

I started using it nearly a year ago now and I am constantly writing things I look forward to remembering over again. You can get a copy on Amazon: One Line A Day, A 5 Year Memory Book << if you click on the blue it will take you to it in Amazon.

Start your list today. What are you proud of? Keep the list. Add to it.

Here’s to a future of achievements and memories

Jen x

 

 

 

I hate you so much right now

I hate you so much right now…

I hate you, you’re fat, you’re ugly, you’re stupid, you’re useless, you’re not worth it, you don’t deserve good things, you’re a failure… There are a lot of nasty things that we tell ourselves and all too often. Let’s face it, telling yourself it once is one time too often. That nasty bitch that lives in our heads is our own worst critic that never gives us a break.

Each time you tell yourself one of these lies, you look for verification that it is true, what you look for you find.

If you think you are fat, you weigh yourself, compare yourself to someone else who is smaller than you, try on an outfit that you know doesn’t fit you.

If you think you are ugly, you only see and hear the people who you think reject you, you forget about all the friends and family you have that love you and see your beauty.

You go out of your way to prove to yourself that you are no good.

If your friend spoke to you like that, how long would you let them hang around? Even the meanest of people would think twice about saying these things out loud. If someone spoke like that to me, chances are they wouldn’t have their own teeth for long (not that I condone violence, but you wouldn’t stand there and take it).

What do you do to shut her up?

This can be tough to do especially if you have done a good job of convincing yourself that you are a worthless, ugly piece of shit that doesn’t deserve to be happy.

The good news is though if you can convince yourself that much that you are crap, you will have the same power within you to turn that round.

It’s your choice what you think and how you feel about yourself.

First thing I want you to do is get out of your own head, look at yourself as though you are actually standing outside your own body looking at you as a stranger. What do the people who love you think of you? What is it the love about you? What are your positive traits that you have on your CV? Why do your friends want to hang out with you?

Find 5 things that you love about yourself (these can be physical or personality) do this first thing in the morning.

Once you have that 5, keep the list where you can see it.

Then, at the end of your day add at least another 5 to that list.

Tomorrow and the next day and for the rest of the week, repeat, repeat, repeat… find as many things as you can and create a huge list so big that when the nasty thoughts come in to your head you have that list ready.

Believe in yourself

Jen x

Saturday Kitchen

Saturday Kitchen

This has to be one of my favourite breakfasts at the moment. I like oats in the morning because they fill me up without feeling sluggish and I can eat them before I go and teach a class without any worries of feeling unwell.

Mixed Grain Porridge (Muesli)

30g Gluten free oats

40g Mix of rye, millet, buckwheat & quinoa flakes (you can use any mix you like)

10g Chia seeds

1 tablespoon desiccated coconut

1 tablespoon goji berries

2 dates chopped (I use medjool dates – check ingredients for ones coated in glucose syrup)

1 teaspoon cinnamon

100ml coconut / almond / rice / oat milk

Add all ingredients to jar, mix and cover, then leave overnight to soak.

In the morning eat as is or add some more milk to create desired texture. Option to eat cold or heat it up.

Any choice of dried fruit or even fresh fruit like banana can be added, cinnamon is optional

PS If you do know someone who would enjoy or benefit from my emails you can forward them this email link so they can sign up too https://freedomintraining.leadpages.net/leadbox/140a9de73f72a2%3A1688fc78ab46dc/5765606242516992/

 

PPS I am taking applications for working with me one to one and details of the online programme will be out in the next couple of weeks. https://warriorwomanproject.wufoo.com/forms/ultimate-warrior-woman-copy/